The path toward happiness in life and love
The secret to life is perspective.
Things are never as bad as they seem. Focus on the good and you will find happiness. And that (happiness) should be your goal.
If happiness is not your goal, then your first step is to revise your goals.
Love is not measured by how happy someone makes you
but by your willingness to sacrifice for them.
Sometimes dealing with crap in a relationship (from both sides) is a sign of something really meaningful. Obviously, it's ideal when you can find ways to work together to minimize the pain. (and there's always pain)
...sort of like the four noble truths
of Buddhism.
revised as:
1. Love means suffering.
2. The origin of suffering is selfishness.
3. The cessation of suffering is attainable.
4. The path to the cessation of suffering (taking the middle path between your needs and your other's needs).
Of course, it's not individual enlightenment you seek in this case. So, both will need to walk the path in order to achieve this enlightenment.